My List of Books...

I am doing my Bible reading this year in a random order.

So far, I have read, Obadiah, Nahum, Proverbs, Jonah, and Judges. But I keep losing my lists, so I had one made at random.org, and these are the rest of the books of the Bible in the order I am going to read them.

Ezekiel
Hebrews
Acts
2 Thessalonians
Ecclesiastes
Ruth
Deuteronomy
Habakkuk
2 John
Lamentations
Psalms
Galatians
Amos
1 Timothy
Job
Ezra
Malachi
Esther
Joel
Jeremiah
Philippians
Romans
Ephesians
Exodus
Numbers
2 Samuel
2 Timothy
Zechariah
Isaiah
Zephaniah
Philemon
Mark
1 Kings
1 Thessalonians
Nehemiah
2 Kings
Genesis
Jude
James
Hosea
1 Samuel
Daniel
Luke
Leviticus
Song of Solomon
1 John
Colossians
2 Corinthians
Haggai
2 Chronicles
Micah
Titus
1 Peter
Matthew
Joshua
Revelation
1 Corinthians
John
3 John
2 Peter
1 Chronicles


I mostly put it up so I can have it in a handy spot, so I don't do a panicked search like I tried to last night.

On other Bible notes, my verse memorization has been a total fail, but I still have one day, so let us see what I can do.

Schedule Says

So, I have officially finished my first week of insanity at school.

My schedule is

Intro to Cosmology 10-1115
African Diaspora in the US 1130-1245
Film as History 1-215
Terror and Totalitarianism 230-345
Ancient World 4-515

On Tuesdays I leave school at 5 and go to work until 8
and on Thursdays I stay late to work for Dr. Talamante.

I already have obscene amounts of homework to do, and I still need to finish my paper from last semester.

Then I need to get my space cleaned up and get organized for the next week.

This is just a random update. Know I am going to be obscenely busy this semester.

In all of the fervor...

to concentrate on being healthier, I think that we (especially me) forget to think about how our inner self can be healthier.

In Proverbs it says, "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." And in one way, I have been challenged by this, to make sure that I am not placing my heart in a position where it will be hurt by people. I have a tendency to worry so much about making the people I care about happy that I overlook it when they hurt me. I just can't do that anymore. At some point I have to make a stand to take care of myself, and I am vowing to do this now.

This may mean that I will not give you the answer you are looking for when you asking me something, but in order to serve God in the way he has called me to, my heart needs to not be in a continual cycle of hurt and repair. In order to grow, I can not be in recovery mode all the time.

Please pray that I make wise decisions about who I spend my time with.

Rough Day

Having a rough day, and that has unfortunately exploded into me having a cranky attitude at everyone. I am sorry if that crankiness has affected anyone else.

I am not cranky because of anything that happened, or anyone, it is just one of those days.

I know I struggle with some hardcore spiritual/emotional issues, and it is just one of those bad days.

It is one of those days where I need to do serious battle in the spiritual realm.

I need to do so many things, but this needs to become a priority, because it is interrupting my life.

I am seriously just in need of some quality time, time I am not going to get if I sit here blogging while watching TV...

-----------------------------------------------------------

To Do:

Find Library books
Return Library Books
Pay Fees
Get Hold Removed
Pick Classes
Register for Classes
Meet with Prof #1 to receive letters of recommendation
Meet with Prof #2 to discuss work schedule
Go to Dollar Tree
Purchase Yellow and Green Streamers for Library Craft if possible (must go elsewhere if they don't)
See if they have gold glitter for same craft
Look at 1 dollar storage ideas
Work on Paper
Dinner with a friend
Clean for a bit
Sleep


This is what my day is probably going to look like. I should also do laundry at some point. Hopefully tonight.

My boss doesn't think that me having Saturday off for women's retreat will be that big of a deal, but I will have to work on Fri. Especially since I do believe I have an international art activity that day... But it is a quick one and I'll have someone take over for me if it is still going at 4 which is when I plan on leaving.
We will be making Australian Platypusses.

This Friday we are making Chinese dragon puppets, because Monday is Chinese New Year.... I LOVE Chinese food!

Week Of Prayer Report

It was both a difficult and an amazing week at the same time.

I spent a couple days of the week deeply discouraged, but heard from God and can now see that there is hope, where before I saw no hope at all.

On Friday, God broke open a whole new chapter in my life. I am so excited because he began a healing work in my life. A healing that I have needed for so much longer than I even knew.

Not a healing of my back, I am still waiting for that. This is a deeper healing of my spirit. I know it is going to be a process, not neccesarily a comfortable one, and that this is probably not going to be an amazing overnight occurance, but that in the end I will be more whole that I have ever been.

I wait in joyous anticipation of that day.

Verse # 2

He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters. He rescued me from my powerful enemy, from my foes, who were too strong for me. They confronted me in the day of my disaster, but the LORD was my support. He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.

Psalm 18:16-19


I was going to do some verses earlier in the chapter but upon reflection realized that these were more pertinent to my life.

quizlet

50 Questions To Really Get To Know Someone
1) Are you a morning or night person?	usually morning but not until i get a shower
2) Which do you prefer, sweet or salty foods?	sweet
3) Ninjas or pirates?	ninja pirates
4) Ninjas vs pirates, discuss.	they tie, because the ninja outwits the pirate, but in the pirate's drunkeness he ends up knocking out the ninja with his rum bottle!
5) Autobots or Decepticons?	Autobots DUH!
6) What was your favorite childhood television program?	I had too many
7) Are you a collector of anything?	Banks, souveniers, stuffed sharks
8) If you could be any animal, what would you be?	shark
9) If you could have any superpower, what would it be?	teleportation
10) What is usually your first thought when you wake up?	what time is it
11) What do you usually think about right before falling asleep?	nothing
12) What's your favorite color?	blue
13) What's your favorite animal?	shark
14) Do you believe in extraterrestrials or life on other planets?	not really
15) Do you believe in ghosts?	nope
16) Ever been addicted to a video/computer game? Which one(s)?	TETRIS!
17) You're given 1 million dollars, what do you spend it on?	a house
18) Have any bad habits?	a few
19) Which bad habits, if any, drive you crazy?	if any itd be spitting
20) List 3 of your best personality traits:	Intelligent, good sense of humor, kind
21) List 3 of your worst personality traits:	insecure, socially awkward and no sense of style
22) Have any celebrity crushes?	A few!
23) List 1 thing you wish you could change about yourself:	Insecurity
24) Any tattoos or piercings?	ears
25) What's the first thing you notice in the opposite sex?	eyes, hands,
26) What personality traits do you look for in a partner?	kind, Loves God
27) What personality traits do you dislike in other people?	self absorbtion
28) Are you mostly a clean or messy person?Do you see yourself getting married in the next 5 years?	messy... its a fact... Married in five years? who knows!
29) Are you mostly a clean or messy person?	I just answered this lol no need to rub it in
30) If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?	The Pacific Northwest
31) If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would you go?	St. Petersburg I <3it
32) List 5 goals on your life's to-do list:	Travel more, adopt children, get married, finish school, swim with sharks
33) Name 1 regret you have:	not finishing school already
34) Name 1 thing you miss about being a kid:	not having bills and responsibilities
35) Name 1 thing you love about being an adult:	not having a curfew
36) What's your favorite song of the moment?	Worth it All
37) What's your favorite song of all time?	I dunno...
38) What's your favorite thing to do on a Saturday night?	Movies, hang out with friends
39) What's your favorite thing to do on a Sunday afternoon?	take a nap!
40) Have any hidden talents?	sure do
41) You're about to walk the green mile, what do you have as your last meal?	rocky road ice cream, filet mignon, chicken strips, scalloped potatos, brownies and dr pepper
42) What would be your dream job?	Mom
43) Which would you rather have, 100 million dollars or true love?	true love duh
44) If you could have 3 wishes granted, what would they be?	a house, a gas friendly vehicle and unlimited frequent flyer miles
45) Ever wish you were born the opposite sex? If so, why?	not really, occaisionally when the PMS gets bad
46) Name 1 thing not many people know about you:	how many eyelashes I have
47) If you HAD to change your name, what would you change it to?	Anastasia Marie
48) Do you believe in the afterlife?	Yi
49) On the topic of abortion, how do you feel about cookies?	I feel that cookies are amazing, but abortions are not.
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The Question of Suffering

This video addresses the question of suffering. It also echoes some of the things Nate was discussing last night at the end of youth. I think that the bit at the end really makes a point.

I found this on someone else's blog and he pulled it from someone else's but I welcome you to continue the conversation here.

Fear Factor

I find it random that all around me fear is being discussed. It is in my daily Bible readings, it is the topic of our last Bible Study, I heard God speak to me about fear at Sunday night prayer... I know God is trying to get my attention about fear, but I am still finding myself paralyzed by it.

I NEED to go to prayer tonight, but am afraid to.

There are more than a few reasons why I would rather not go and all of them have to do with fear.

So I am here, asking for prayer. I need to courage to go tonight, because at this moment staying home is the better looking of the plans, but I know that I NEED to be there.

...

On other notes, my aunt has a "short circuit" in her brain that has been making her have seizures and pass out, she is also slowly suffering from kidney failure. The plans are for one of my cousins to give her kidney to her mom, but my aunt is 75 and so I don't know what exactly is the plan.

So if y'all could pray for her too, I would appreciate it.

Uncomfortable

This week is Week of Prayer @ Calvary.

Last Night we focused on searching out hidden sin and just making sure our hearts were aligned with God's. I know that for me, the last year has been a ginormous dose of that, so last night I found God pointing out little things to me, and as He was doing so, I decided that some times it is the little things that can be the most uncomfortable to have removed.

Sometimes it is easier to have a steel pole removed than it is a splinter. They both hurt, but if the pole comes out easier than the splinter than the smaller splinter can be as uncomfortable or more to have removed.

I have ben finding that I am more afraid of the pain of the removal of the "splinters" in my spiritual life, and am like the little kid who pulls their hand away when you come at them with the tweezers.

But the splinters have to go.

God can't make me whole until I let him pull out even the littlest splinter in my soul.

It isn't comfortable at all but it needs to be done.

Tonight our focus is on Unity, Guidance and Empowerment...

The Sacred Echo

I received The Sacred Echo by Margaret Feinberg as a gift for Christmas.

I had seriously almost purchased it for myself at least 6 times since its release, but at some point had always come up with a reason why I shouldn't. But, God is faithful to provide us with what we need and so some dear friends found themsleves giving me a gift that they thought would be useful, but didn't know I had been wanting for a while.

I am now reading it for the second time in a week. The first read through was one of those "I can't get enough what is she going to say next" type of reads but even then I realized that to truly receive the most from this book, I was going to have to look at it again (and again and again probably)

The first chapter discusses why she wrote the book, and in it she explains that while she was very uncomfortable with the prospect of being vulnerable before such a wide audience, she felt God was asking her to, and that she hoped it would help others draw nearer to God.

In her vulnerability, I have been truly blessed. The book is basically the last year of my prayer life. She addresses all of the major issues I have been wrestling with God about and offers an additional perspective for my ponderings.

Most of my readers know me, and most of you know what I deal with, but even those things which I have kept close to myself out of fear, God used the book to make me realize that yes He knows and hears my cries. Even when I don't want to admit that those are the cries of my heart.

So, I highly recommend this book to everyone, and I am sure most of you will hear it referenced in conversation sometime soon.

On a side note, next week is Week of Prayer at my church, If you attend Calvary I encourage you to come out and join us. I have seen amazing things happen during this week in years past. If you don't, could you remember to lift up Calvary Assembly of God, its leadership and its members as you pray this next week? Thanks!

Got Fear?

From my devotional Bible today... Something to ponder.... It is the devotional reading for Proverbs 8 &9

None of us likes to be afraid. We associate fear with strong, negative
emotions: dread, terror, anxiety, cowardice, panic, timidity, abhorrence,
revulsion, and despair. Fear generates a flight-or-fight response deep
within us. We avoid whatever makes us afraid whenever we can and fight
against it when we can't escape it. So what, then, does it mean to fear
the Lord? For those who do not know God, dread and terror of
punishmentare appropriate responses. But for those who truly seek knowledge of the Holy One, fear is transformed into reverence and
awe.

Fear of the Lord is the very basis of our worship. It inspires
within us reverence for God's majesty and power and illuminates the great gulf between our humanness and God's divinity. Fear induces us to obedience and service; it emboldens us to avoid sin and live a holy life. Fear galvanizes us to hate evil and treasure good. It quickens our hearts with worshipful respect for God and infuses us with the love of
God.

The wonderful Paradox of fear of the Lord is that this fear
ultimately frees you from all other fears. Fear of God gives you wisdom to know he is in charge, not you. It brings knowledge of his holiness-and
nothing can challenge that power. Fear of God brings understanding to all
other fears and gladdens your heart. 'Do not fear anything except the Lord Almighty. He alone is the Holy One. If you fear him, you need fear nothing else.' (Isaiah 8:13)

Philipians

I've decided to shorten the verse I am memorizing. A lot of it has to do with some interesting things God is doing in my life. Same verses except I am cutting it to Phillipians 2:3-5.

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus."

I have had an interesting day so far. But nothing earth shatteringly cool or weird. Just a normal day.

Indescribable

Today I went to the Aquarium of the Pacific with my boss/supervisor Marcia and her two children. At one point she asked her youngest son "Who made the otters?" and then was explaining to him about how God made all the animals. A little while later we were in the tropical reef area in the aquarium and I was walking past a tank of fish in the most amazing colors I've ever seen, and it hit me that God created these fish in these amazing colors, God created them to reflect HIS glory, knowing that most people throughout history would never get to see them. Even if no man ever walked this Earth, the glory of God would be evident in His creation.

And so it starts...

Philippians 2:3-11Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death — even death on a cross! Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Well, this is the first verse for me to memorize.

I also am starting a daily devotional Bible, but I know if I try to start in Genesis I won't get past Exodus without quitting. So I put all the names of the books of the Bible on papers and drew them and made a list. So today I started with Obadiah, and tomorrow is Nahum, and so far and so forth, I already think that this was a really good idea because Obadiah is not a book I would randomly decide to read on my own. And all of the Bible is important. So I should read all of it.

Well, other than resting and going to Target I have no plans for today. Hooray for a day of rest.