Trunk or Treat

Tonight was the Trunk or Treat outreach at church. These are my observations.

1. I was the first of the Wordless Book people. One thing that I think might have been helpful was if I had a script in Spanish too. The area we live in has a significant population of Spanish speakers. I ended up simplifying the message a couple times due to the language barrier and I felt bad.

2. My car was awesomely decorated. (well, actually it was Cassie's car, but I decorated it...)



3. Tonight as I was leaving Pastor John was sharing with me and one of the other workers about the people who had said the sinners prayer. The number was much larger than I anticipated. I was excited. I was also excited for some other things he shared, but I am almost positive that we'll all be hearing them Sunday morning, and I don't want to spoil anything for anyone. But mostly I was excited because it was one of the first times that PJ has shared something with me BECAUSE I was a partner in a ministry team, and not to try to show me something, or prove a point. One of the things I have found most frustrating is that people tend to treat me like a child sometimes. I know that part of it is because I tend to act younger than I am, but I sometimes think that its because I am not married and am still in school. But to be honest, none of these things make me less of an adult than I am. I am 27 years old, I am NOT a child. I like to have fun, I derive pleasure from simple things, but I am an ADULT. I really appreciated being treated like one this evening. Especially by my pastor. He has been my pastor for 20 years, since I was a little girl, he often forgets how old I am, and I appreciated being treated like an adult.

(Sorry for the mini rant)

Rawr

This hoodie was the inspiration for my Halloween Costume. I love sharks and had fun making this costume.


 

Iron Chef

So tonight was our campus Iron Chef competition. The secret ingredient was lamb. I don't eat lamb. I have never cooked lamb, and I was the lead for our team.

We made three dishes and came in third place. I don't think the judging was fair, but I am just glad it is over. I am very proud of all my team for working together and making three pretty tasty dishes out of an ingredient that none of us had encountered with zero professional training.

I get to keep my chef coat and we all got certificates for participation.


Our professor complimented our food and we all liked it, so that's all that matters. We had fun and did something new. I hope to post pictures soon.

I found this amazing idea online...

It is the placement of a souvenir depicting a monument in the place where the monument would be in the picture...


For example:





I found them on http://www.totalmania.net/famous-places-and-souvenirs#more-5383

sURVEY sAYS!

I have been busy working on stuff for school and cleaning, but I am too close to the end of October to give up!



45 of the most random things you probably never needed to know about someone

whats your name spelt backwards?: SNIKTA ESIUOL YECATS
What did you do last night?: CARVED A PUMPKIN, HUNG OUT WITH FRIENDS
The last thing you downloaded onto your computer?: ?
Have you ever licked a 9 volt battery?: YES
Last time you swam in a pool?: LAST MONTH
What are you wearing?: RED TSHIRT, WHITE TRASH PJ BOTTOMS
How many cars have you owned?: 5
Type of music you dislike most?: VULGAR
Are you registered to vote?: YES
Do you have cable?: ITS IN THE HOUSE
What kind of computer do you use?: GATEWAY
Ever made a prank phone call?: NOT IN MANY YEARS
You like anyone right now?: MAYBE ;)
Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?: YEP
Furthest place you ever traveled?: ST. PETERSBURG
What's your favorite comic strip?: CALVIN AND HOBBES, UNSHELVED
Do u know all the words to the national anthem?: IF THE MUSIC IS PLAYING
Shower, morning or night?: MORNING
Best movie you've seen in the past month?: TROPIC THUNDER!
Favorite pizza toppings?: PEPPERONI, SAUSAGE, OLIVES, MUSHROOMS
Chips or popcorn?: POPCORN
What cell phone provider do you have?: AT&T
Have you ever smoked peanut shells?: NO... WHY WOULD I?
Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?: NOPE!
Orange Juice or apple?: DEPENDS
Who were the last people you sat at lunch with?: ASHLEY, CHRIS, VARIAN
favorite chocolate bar?: DEPENDS ON MY MOOD
Who is your longest friend and how long?: STACEE/ SHANNA (FOREVERISH)
Last time you ate a homegrown tomato?: THIS SUMMER
Have you ever won a trophy?: YEP! BEST VELVEETA CHEESE!
Favorite arcade game?: SKIBALL
Ever ordered from an infomercial?: NO LOL
Sprite or 7-UP?: SPRITE
Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school/work?: YES
Last thing you bought at Walgreens?: YUMMY KETTLECORN
Ever thrown up in public?: YEP
Would you prefer being a millionaire or finding true love?: TRUE LOVE
Do you believe in love at first sight?: NOPE
SPONGEBOB OR JIMMY NEUTRON?: SPONGEBOB
Did you have long hair as a young kid?: I COULD SIT ON IT
What message is on your voicemail machine?: ?
Where would you like to go right now?: BUDAPEST
Whats the name of your pet?: ...
What kind of back pack do you have, and what's in it?: BLUE JANSPORT AND NOT MUCH AT THE MOMENT
What do you think about most?: SCHOOL?

Fill out this survey yourself
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Photos from Jackson, CA

Some Photos I took while at my aunt's house this summer.

To Boldly Go...

On Myspace also, but just incase I don't get a chance to post a blog on here today.


I am sitting in the University Library and although I have been working on my paper, I am taking a break.

Last night at Bible study we discussed Lion Chasing and a few things stuck out to me.

One, is the whole Abraham and Isaac thing. And incidentally what I said about Abraham having Ishmael and how I have a clean unslept with BRuce (the shark) keep coming to mind. Although it sucks, Ishmael was not Isaac. Just like the clean Bruce is NOT my BAruce, the one who I take everywhere and sleep with. And Isaac was the requested sacrifice because he meant more to Abraham than anything else (except for God apparently) I am in the position of knowing what my Isaac is. (not BAruce incidentally) (whether or not its a good thing that I know what it is is a whole other issue.) But, I really have to ask myself if I am willing to give up my Isaac, if God asks it. And to be 100% honest. I don't know.

But I have been thinking about whether or not Isaac would've survived the encounter on the mountain if Abraham had not been willing to sacrifice him. That ram could've been a lion or a bear, and Isaac could've been taken from Abraham anyhow. I don't believe that God would do that, but I do know that he will remove things from us that we hold precious, if he must because of his love for us.
Do I like it? Heck no!
Do I recognize that it hurts, you bet.
Do I think that a willingness to sacrifice what is precious to us will always result in us not having to make the sacrifice? Nope.

Do I have the answers to any of my questions? Not on your life.

While doing my research, I was reading about Randy Pausch (The Last Lecture guy) and I was inspired by something that is probably an afterthought to those who knew him, but speaks to me. He was a Star Trek Fan. I LOVE Star Trek fans, we are all kind of bonded through our relative geekiness, and while studying Unitarians and Universalists for my paper, I came across the snippet that the next Star Trek film will feature Dr. Pausch in a small role. This stopped me in my tracks and is why I decided to blog in the midst of my scholarly work. I don't know why this speaks to me louder than anything else, but I understand this better than I do the rich mans list of making lots of money.

This wasn't a goal of Dr. Pausch's but it still happened...

I am not saying that I think that the experience changed his life, but I will argue that it had to be exciting for him to do.

I know that there are things in my life that, while completely unexpected, have changed the path of my life. Relationships, random occurences on the street, laziness.

Ok I just realized I am wandering, but really, does anyone get what I am trying to say?

The second thing I have been pondering is the LIST of risks/goals.
I could make a list of things I want to do in my life, but how many of them involve risk?

I only came up with a few items and most of them involved travel, sharks, or school. There are risks involved in all of those, but still fairly safe things if you think about it. I want to take HUMONGOUS risks, both for myself and for God.

I want to take on things that appear ludicrous, I want to chase down the Biggest freaking Lion I can find, and then the next biggest and so on until I die. (Preferably not of Parasites!)

Nothing to see here Folks....

Really.

I just wanted a post for the day.

so heres a picture to make your trip worthwile. It is the Fall 2008 version of Happy Stacey.

Lions. Pits. Battlestar Gallactica.

Not quite as catchy as The Office but I do try.

So, I have entered fully into the lion hunting experience today. I have submitted my frist two applications for grad school and will be doing at least 2 more tomorrow. (I have to call and ask a question because I am submitting applications to two programs at one school) So to put it all out there... I am applying to all of the following:
Cal State Northridge-History
Cal State LA-History
San Jose State-Library Science AND History
Southwestern A/G-History
Simmons College-Dual Degree Program in Archival Studies and History

3 of those schools are not local at all.(San Jose isn't too bad, but SAGU is in Texas and Simmons is in Boston) But I am believing that if I am supposed to stay local my lion will go into a closer pit. And if I am supposed to go farther, I WILL follow that lion to the pit where it descends.

One bit of good news for those that would like to see me stay close is that if my lion is the library degree from San Jose State, I can do most of it as distance education, and just take trips up there for weekend classes.

I need to thank those of you who have kept me in your prayers about this situation. I ask that you continue to do so, and especially pray that the right doors will be opened and the wrong ones shut.



And for those who miss my random posting of song lyrics ( I know at least one person who will stop reading here LOL)This is a snippet of a song that has been running through my head while filling out all of these applications.

Take My Hand by The Kry (I think it is verse 2 and on)

don't live in the past
cause yesterday's gone
wishing memories would last
you're afraid to carry on
you don't know what's comin'
but you know the one who holds tomorrow
I will be your guide
take you through the night
if you keep your eyes on Me

take My hand and walk where I lead
keep your eyes on me alone
don't you say why were the old days better
just because you're scared of the unknown

Pleasantly Surprised

I don't know if it is because of the circumstances in which I was raised, or some general insecurity I suffer from, but it always amazes me when God blesses me in an extraordinary way. I for some reason can't grasp the concept of God wanting to bless me or give me good things. But when He does, I am always pleasantly surprised.

What's with Today, Today?

So today was kind of full of win.

I went to school.

I guessed at an extra credit quiz and guessed right even though I hadn't even read the article. (She hadn't been able to get me a copy of it yet)

I studied for my midterm (and got some help from friends at home) And while I don't think I did fabulous, I think I did okay.

I went to work and had like 13 people show up for my toddler craft night.

I made the sample Venetian mask for my International Craft day on Friday. And it is really cute. I will try to put a picture of it up eventually. I <3 it!

And now I am getting ready for bed. I am so sleepy.

So... I finally did it...

Today I went to my professor to get my drop form signed. And then she made me feel so terrible about dropping that I almost wished I was just willing to take a fail and never had to talk to her at all. It isn't even that she was mean, it is just that she is someone who I admire, and I can't stand to let people I don't care about down, so how much worse is it when you dissapoint someone you look up to. She did say I could sit in on lectures which I will need to do at least once this semester to prove that I am not a chicken (although after today, I'd rather not)

I really am getting much more into the Research assistant position. I think it is interesting to look at these really old documents and try to piece together what happened and why. I was working with French Court documents from 1770 today. Just the pictures of them but it is crazy how they wrote. All I am doing is cataloging them but there is a fair deal of transcription involved and I am picking up some French which will be useful later in life.

I need to get organized and talk to my professors about letters of recommendation. I have talked to a few people about my reservations when it comes to grad school and they have basically said that my concerns are trivial. One professor said that everyone struggles with their foriegn language requirement; another said that its okay if you are only interested in what you like, just do whatever you have to and when its time to do the research it will be in what you are interested in; another told me that I am very bright and they think I will do well in grad school. These all help in my decision making process. Someone from my non-academic life said that they think I should go to grad school, and just prepare for it unless something else pops up.

That person has a point...

I can't just stop moving because I don't know which way to go, I just have to start walking down a path. It may be that I will have to go back and start down another but if I don't start moving I am not going to go anywhere.

Wanderlust...

Although it is barely an hour later, I find myself having a new post for the new day...

I want to travel again.

I know this is silly because I had such a difficult time leaving on my last trip.

But I am now debating between:

Italy and the Mediterranean during WInter Break (which is probably the only time I'd consider going to that region due to the fact that I am CRANKY when I am hot)(with the same company I went with before)

Returning to Russia in the Summer and spend two weeks cruising the rivers, (with the "grown up" version of the company I went to Russia with)

And a tour with Cosmos called Imperial Capitals which goes to England, Drives through France, Belgium, Luxembourg, Germany, Austria, Czech Republic, Slovakia and Hungary.

and between about a million other places...

I know I want to go to Hungary and the Czech Republic. There is also a tour that specifically visits the castle of Vlad the Impaler which I would really want to see, but would not go on a special tour just to see it unless it went other places I want to go.

There is another company I heard from other COntikis about that just drives you from one place to the next in Europe.... Which I just looked up and I may have found the tour of my dreams... It hits both Hungary and the Czech Republic and it visits both Auschwitz and Birkenau which (although it may sound horrible) I would find fascinating to visit.

This traveling concept bears pondering....

I haven't missed a day yet...

but I don't really have anything to say.

I highly recommend reading the book of Acts.

I am craving brownies.

I like to eat honey on my Chicken strips, nuggets, popcorn chicken ect. For some reason the combination of sweet with salty/spicy is yummy.

I am looking forward to church tomorrow. I love it so.

Learning and the nother Awards

I learned this week:

That an 18 page paper seems less daunting of you look at it like it is 4 four page papers and 2 one page papers...Sounds crazy but I am so less stressed now.

After talking to several people, it is apparently weird how I have friends at school. No one I've talked to that didn't move away to go to school made friends like I did. I don't think it's weird, but I have always been less shy around strangers than people I know and so I seem to make friends easily.

And speaking of friends... Some honorable mentions are deserved...

Ashley is AMAZING for getting to school almost 3 hours early so she could sit a table for the History Club. She was going to be there alone but I went to keep her company and she greeted me with a chai latte (yum) and cookies! (The breakfast of champions)

Chris wins the award for keeping a set of handouts from me for class. And for basically giving me the heads up that we have a midterm Tuesday (I had talked to the professor and she forgot to mention that to me).

Varian wins the knight in shining armor award for rescuing my Diet Dr. Pepper from underneath the table (if I had had to retrieve it I couldn't have) and it was a new bottle! I NEEDS my Diet Dr. Pepper!

Jessica M. Wins the award for being super helpful at work. I needed to get my cupboard organized and I needed to find the dot markers. She helped my put everything within my reach on the floor and when I was done she out the boxes back in my shelf and took out my trash for me. She didn't have to do this, but she did because she knew I shouldn't do it (but would if I had to)

Marcia wins the Sharing of the lunch award for sharing her lunch with me on Wednesday. I was running late and didn't have a chance to eat so she shared her Veggie sandwich from Subway and some chips with me. It was very yummy.

These people don't (to my knowledge) read my blog and those of you who do will probably never get to interact with them. :( But I thought that I should brag about them so that you could get another look at who my nother friends are.

I learned (or actually figured out) like half of my Christmas list and other exciting things. Just by walking around Michael's.

I was going to write some more but i got distracted by youtube and its after midnight... My schedule says I should be asleep now... LOL (Denise the schedule is NOT a contract it is a guide...)

tHE bLoG jACKEr StrIKeS aGAiN

So I made a schedule like Nicky did...




I was highly dismayed to see a couple of things:

I spend way too much time driving

Although I didn't set a time I do eat dinner almost everyday

I work in some capacity everyday except for Thursdays (but if you count the club as work then it is everyday)

I have set aside 8 hours a week for homework, not nearly enough...

That is prolly all I am gonna ponder for today... I am kinda sleepy I got up super early to do school stuff.

Pretty

So I found out from a little bird that my last layout was difficult to read. I hope this one is better because I really like it.

So I would like to ask all my blog readers to pray for a situation at my work. I can't go into what it is, and it is definitely not anyone harrassing me or anything like that. But prayers for wisdom for the people in charge of the situation to have wisdom and insight would be much appreciated.

Ummm, I have to get up early to work on something for school. Prayers for school would be greatly appreciated. It is a stressful time for me right now.

And while I am asking for prayer, lets just remind everyone that my back needs fixing.

OK The end...

I really LOVE my strawberrylime soda from the coffee cafe at church. They make me happy!

So, Today was one of those days when I just felt like crying all day, but only for a while.

I took my computer to church so Nate could make it AMAZING! And he did, but then I just exploded in a gigantic burst of angst at him. I am so stressed about so much, and he made the mistake of asking me what was wrong.

AFter he let me vent, he said something that made me a little upset at first. He told me to go drive to the beach and just sit there and be still. And to be honest, I didn't like that answer at first. SO, at first I made excuses... " I don't like the beach." "It's too far" Then I finally decided that I did need to take a few minutes to calm myself. So I agreed to go down to the prayer room. But on my way downstairs I decided that if I did, I probably wouldn't be able to completely be still.

So I took off, I drove up Western and went on Paseo Del Mar up toward Pt. Fermin. I contemplated stopping, but decided to keep driving. Then I ended up at the new Target in San Pedro. Sometimes it helps me to be doing something while I am pondering. (For Example... I am watching Biggest Loser as I type this) So I did some shopping, nothing major, mostly just looked around while I was thinking about life, and all the causes of my stress. And everything. Then I went to TacoBell because it was lunch time and I was hungry. Then I decided to drive towards Redondo because I still had 45 minutes until I had to return to church to pick up my computer. On the way I turned on the Fish. I hate that station with a passion but decided that listening to KROQ while trying to "be still" wasn't a great idea.

For the first time ever, The Fish proved to have some use in my life. 2 Songs came on that I really, really needed to hear. One of them was Word of God Speak by Mercy Me.

Here are the Lyrics:
I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say

[CHORUS]
Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak

I'm finding myself in the midst of You
Beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice

------------------------------------------

I got two things from this. One is that in all of my business, I often find that putting time to just rest in God's presence and to listen for his still, small, voice has taken a back burner in my life. I think that it could be because it is a passive activity. Praying is active, reading is active, and they are easier for me to do. But for some reason just being still is harder for me.

The other song that is seemingly unrelated is Cinderella by Steven Curtis Chapman.
When it first came on I was like "Great, another sappy father daughter song, just what I need to help me be LESS angsty." And there in my car, I heard it, the voice of my Abba telling me, "Yes, I know you haven't had an earthly father to dance with you, or to treat you like the princess you are, but you are my precious, precious daughter and I want to dance with you." And boy, I'll tell you, that that had absolutely nothing to do with why I was angsty and stressed, but it helped make my day so much better, to have heard from my Abba.

Call me Crazy, but it did...

She spins and she sways to whatever song plays,
Without a care in the world.
And I'm sittin' here wearin' the weight of the world on my shoulders.
It's been a long day and there's still work to do,
She's pulling at me saying "Dad I need you!
There's a ball at the castle and I've been invited and I need to practice my dancin'"
"Oh please, daddy, please!"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Oh I will dance with Cinderella
I don't wanna miss even one song,
Cuz all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone

She says he's a nice guy and I'd be impressed
She wants to know if I approve of the dress
She says "Dad, the prom is just one week away,
And I need to practice my dancin'"
"Oh please, daddy, please!"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Ohh-oh ohh-oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't wanna miss even one song,
Cuz all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone
She will be gone.

Well, she came home today
With a ring on her hand
Just glowin' and tellin' us all they had planned
She says "Dad, the wedding's still six months away
but I need to practice my dancin'"
"Oh please, daddy please!"

So I will dance with Cinderella
While she is here in my arms
'Cause I know something the prince never knew
Ohh-oh ohh-oh, I will dance with Cinderella
I don't wanna miss even one song,
(even one song)
Cuz all too soon the clock will strike midnight
And she'll be gone

-----------------------------------------------------

So, that's about it from me for tonight. I am all caught up on Biggest Loser and I need to get up super early for work tomorrow. It is another busy day. But I need to make sure I add more time to just rest in God's presence.

I know I didn't really rest in His presence today, but he was still gracious to meet me where I was (on PCH by Best Buy lol)

cds.....

As I don't really have anything to report as of yet, hopefully I'll have the news I was anticipating tomorrow night.

I am on a big music kick right now. I can't wait for the Cds I bought today to come. I purchased some cds of my youth from amazon and a couple of them were only like 3 dollars with shipping! A total win.

If anyone has Dogwood's Through THick and Thin, I would love to listen to it.

The Freshman 15...

Well not really... One more meme/ survey thingy. I hopefully will have lots of exciting news to share tomorrow night after school. Keep your fingers crossed.


Freshman 15...

Name 1 word to describe you:

Determined

Name 2 of Your Hobbies:

Travel
Reading

Name 3 Things in your Room:

Sharks
Books
Clothes

Name 4 Things that you love:

Russia
Movies
Tea
History

Name 5 People you trust with your Life:

Jesus
The <3's
Nate
Chris
Bill

Name 6 things that get you Ticked:

Prejudice
Oppression
Willful Ignorance
War
Suffering
Research Papers

Name 7 Inside jokes with your group:

Um, I am not really sure what the inside jokes are. I could assume that office references could be considered inside jokes. And then there are the sayings that aren't really jokes but that we all get... Hmmmm maybe jokes about horses and twirly skirts... I fail at this section... Oh well...


Name 8 things you couldn't live without:

Jesus
Water
Air
Food
Friends
The rest I could live without but wouldn't want to
Diet Dr. Pepper
Laptop/Internet
Chocolate

Name 9 Foods you are obsessed with:

Cupcakes
Bacon
Chocolate
Soda
Chicken
Spaghetti and Meatballs
Jalapenos
Macaroni and Cheese
Meatloaf

Name 10 reasons why nobody can be you:

Because the position has already been filled.
Because nobody else wants the job.
Because no one else is as Amazing as I am.
Because God made me unique.
Because No one is quite as obsessed with Russia as I am.
Because I have a patent on myself.
Because no one else has my DNA.
Because no one else has my fingerprints.
Because everyone else is too busy being themsleves.
Because only I know ALL my secrets.

Name 11 animals off the top of your head:

Sharks
Owls
Llamas
Bats
Chickens
Goats
Lions
Giraffes
Cats
Aligators
Eagles

Name 12 Celebrities who get on your nerves:

Brittney Spears
Miley Cyrus (sorry Stacee)
Lindsey Lohan
Tom Cruise
Rachel Ray
Dr.Phil
Ryan Gosling
Hilary Duff
Jaime Lee Curtis
John Travolta
Sylvester Stallone
Sarah Jessica Parker

Name 13 Movies (good or bad)

Stardust
Shaun of the Dead
Hot Fuzz
Clue
Van Helsing
Robin Hood: Men in Tights
The Producers
Enchanted
Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure
Tropic Thunder
Good Night and Good Luck
Anastasia
The Labyrinth

Name 14 CDs that you have or want: (This must be old who has Cds anymore? But still I'd like these!)(I may have to go take a looksie at ebay:) )

Happy Christmas
Happy Christmas 2
Jeff Deyo Saturate
Newsboys Going Public
Newsboys Take Me to Your Leader
Dogwood Through Thick and Thin
Slick Shoes Rusty
Joy Electric CHRISTIANsongs
Supertones Adventures of the OC Supertones
Supertones Supertones Strike Back
Supertones Any Given Day
Insyderz Skallelujah
Insyderz Skallelujah 2
The Kry What About now

Name 15 Words you probably use too much:

Eh!
Angst(y)
Russia
Sharkies!
Oi!
Soda!
Cuppycakes!
Dude!
Amazazing!
Adobo!
Drugs
I
Me
My
Mine

Well, after a few days of memes I think its time for a "real" blog. Yesterday I went back to work, It wasn't too bad. This morning was bad, but I went in anyway because we were short staffed. Thankfully it was quiet both days.

I have to go to Fresno next Saturday to work on my research paper. This would be exciting but I am so over school. I like 3 of my classes, and once I drop the one class, I will like all of them, but I think the pressure of deciding what to do next is getting to me. I am famous for hindering myself when I don't want to face something. The fact is, I don't want to think about what is next. I am kinda happy where I am now, and change is scary. Next semester I am taking classes on Film as History with one of my favorite professors who happens to be retiring next semster, and a class on Terror and Totalitarianism with another professor whose class style is amazing and learning doesn't feel like a chore in her classes.

Then I graduate. Hopefully I can figure out what to do next soon. But I do know that God moves in movement and that I need to do something.

My back is okay as long as I am in the middle of one of my well medicated periods. I am still super twingy in some positions but the pain is less sharp. I have been sleeping throught the night because of my muscle relaxer, it is amazing but makes me kind of groggy in the morning. My friend's uncle is a chiropractor and he said that depending on my xrays and what exactly is wrong, he doesn't know if he can help. But he is gonna take a look at my xrays when he gets back form vacation and see what he can tell me.

All of the comments on my one blog about offending someone humored me. I took the offensive part out and then forgot to change my disclaimer. Tomorrow will probably be a meme night or something else fun.

On a Lighter Note

So, after yesterday's post of deepness, I thought I would follow up with a light post of fun and well mannered frivolity...


Which book do you irrationally cringe away from reading, despite seeing only positive reviews?

Hmmm... For some reason I haven't read any of the Twilight books yet. I also haven't read any Jane Austen books. I don't know why, but really the thought of reading them making me make that face of discomfort...

If you could bring three characters to life for a social event (afternoon tea, a night of clubbing, perhaps a world cruise), who would they be and what would the event be?

Hello, world cruise! James Qwilleran from Lillian Jackson Braun's The Cat Who Series (because we need someone to pay for the cruise!)and because he is a good conversationalist. Hmmm.... Hannah Swensen from The Joann Fluke Cookie Murders Series. She is happy and fun and I need to tell her she is supposed to marry Norman the Dentist... And she could make us cookies! It is hard to pick...:/ MAybe Percy Jackson from the Percy Jackson Series. As long as he is on the boat we are safe, and to be honest, that kid needs a break.

I would've said Severus Snape and Remus Lupin from Harry Potter, but Snape from the series is a total jerk, I would rather take Fanfic Snape, and A werewolf on a cruise would be a little dangerous (but very hot!)

(Borrowing shamelessly from the Thursday Next series by Jasper Fforde): you are told you can’t die until you read the most boring novel on the planet. While this immortality is great for awhile, eventually you realise it’s past time to die. Which book would you expect to get you a nice grave?

War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy... I would be immortal practically becasue everytime I pick up that book I fall asleep. I feel it is gonna be one of those books that I wiki to find out what happens...

Come on, we’ve all been there. Which book have you pretended, or at least hinted, that you’ve read, when in fact you’ve been nowhere near it?

1984 by George Orwell... I read the Spark Notes, I know what happens, I've read the beginning and the end... doesn't that count? The blog I took this from said any books assigned in High School and Junior High which is the same for me except for Lord of the Flies by William Golding and Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood. I read those. I don't like being told what to read it messes with my mind...

As an addition to the last question, has there been a book that you really thought you had read, only to realise when you read a review about it/go to ‘reread’ it that you haven’t?

I thought I had read Wuthering Heights for the longest time, and then I realized that I hadn't, I had read Watership Down and was getting them confused. Oh well, I can't remember anything about Watership Down except for that there's rabbits in it, so I should probably one day read both of them.

You’re interviewing for the post of Official Book Advisor to some VIP (who’s not a big reader). What’s the first book you’d recommend and why? (if you feel like you’d have to know the person, go ahead of personalise the VIP)

I would say the Bible, but hopefully they already read that. Um... Possibly Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood. I think it depends on what kind of VIP they are. If they are political I would say that book, If they are a church VIP they would have to read Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller and The Shack. If they were historians, they would have to read something like Harry Potter just to get their heads out of their own timelines...

A good fairy comes and grants you one wish: you will have perfect reading comprehension in the foreign language of your choice. Which language do you go with?

Russian Cyrillic! Um DUH!

A mischievious fairy comes and says that you must choose one book that you will reread once a year for the rest of your life (you can read other books as well). Which book would you pick?

All Creatures Great and Small by James Herriot, I usually read it at least that often as it is my favorite book of all time...

I know that the book blogging community, and its various challenges, have pushed my reading borders. What’s one bookish thing you ‘discovered’ from book blogging (maybe a new genre, or author, or new appreciation for cover art-anything)?

I do actually have a new found love for books on living the Christian life. It helps to have someone blog about them and give you an honest review/opinion.

That good fairy is back for one final visit. Now, she’s granting you your dream library! Describe it. Is everything leatherbound? Is it full of first edition hardcovers? Pristine trade paperbacks? Perhaps a few favourite authors have inscribed their works? Go ahead-let your imagination run free.


Yay! Firstly, it is huge! Secondly it is all done in Ravenclaw colors! I would have a whole section of leatherbound classics. I would have a section for Fantasy and mysteries. Probably a whole wall dedicated to books on history and travel. I would have a section for paperback version of my favorite books that magically replaced themselves with new copies whenever the one before it had gotten damaged or lost.... I would have an awesome sound system for listening to music, and I would have a little are set up for making tea that magically stays stocked.

Trust a blog meme....

So there are a bunch of blog prompts on the net and this is one I chose for today. Some of these things are things I am only putting because I trust all 6 of my blog readers not to intentionally hurt me.

The Rule of Five

Answer these 5 sets of 5 Questions...


5 People Who Made You do something you didn't want to, but ended up being grateful they did.


1. Sarah/Nate/Denise/Stacee: Made me get on the airplane....Thanks Guys!

2. John Hodges: Made me go visit my dad, in fact he wouldn't let me go to some youth event until I had. It was the last time I saw my dad before he died. I am truly grateful even if I was a total brat about it.

3. My Mom: Made me do a lot of stuff that I didn't want to while growing up, and now I am grateful.

4. Denise (again) makes me watch movies that I complain about having to watch, but then I like.

5. The last person is remaining unnamed, but if they were to read this they would know who they are. Constanttly making me do things, just because I should, because they are good for me, or because they are the right thing to do.... When I end up being a better person than I am today, you'll be at least partially responsible...


5 Things people don't know about you.


1. When I was in fourth grade the school made me see a psychiatrist because I had Trichotillomania. I still have it but not as bad. It is the compulsive pulling out of ones hair. One day they discovered I had no eyelashes and a giant spot on the side of my head with no hair. It ended up being okay, the shrink was nice and when I "graduated" he gave me a giant lavender rag doll. I really liked that doll. And now I have eyelashes again.

2. There are only 5 people who can hug me without making me flinch. And I hate it. It isn't because I don't like everyone else, It's a total me thing. If you are one of those five you are one of the people I trust the most in life, feel special.

3. I used to think I was going to die young because I didn't think that God had a plan for my life, because I didn't know what it was. I still don't but I'll recognize that He has one...I wish he would tell me what it is...

4. I almost didn't graduate from high school. (Not exactly a secret but I am running out of things to put.)

5. If I had to give up either chocolate or soda, I would give up chocolate...And then no one would be my friend...


5 Things that make you smile.


1. Any of the animals I love (sharks, owls, bats, dinosaurs, llamas, kittens)

2. Geeky pop culture references! (make it so!, 42, my precious...)or any reference to Russia!

3. Rainy days

4. My friends

5. Things that are BLUE


5 Songs that represent your life.


1. Falling Down Like Rain by Jeff Deyo

2. At Your Library by Bill Harley

3. Closer by Sanctus Real

4. Children of the Lord by Joy Electric

5. Christmas in Sarajevo by Trans Siberian Orchestra


5 Places you want to visit.


1. Budapest (It looks so pretty in the travel guide)

2. Romania (I love the vampires!)

3. Washington D.C. (I'm American, I should go at least once)

4. Vancouver (to visit the Canadians)

5. St. Petersburg (yes! Again! I love it sooooo!)

Copying Nicky

10 Years Ago...

I had just turned 17. My mom had just died. I was a newish Christian, but was hardcore involved with my youth group. I had no job, and I hated school. I lived with Grandma. I weighed a lot more than I do now. Like 70 pounds more. I was business manager of the school paper. I used to drive around the peninsula with Amber and Danny in Danny's VW. We would go hill jumping!


10 Years from now...

I will be 37. My children will hopefully be in their teens. Since I want to adopt older kids. I will hopefully be in ministry of some form. I really honestly don't care what I am doing in ten years as long as I am serving God with my whole heart, and living a sold out life for Him.


The ENd...

Side Note...

I am writing this in the youth room and Nate said that in 10 years I'll be living in Russia with my Husband of 9 years.... Alas, I wish it were true!

Waterloo!

I feel a bit better today. I was able to sit down and eat dinner which is an improvement over having to stand up to eat. I am hoping to be even better by tomorrow, because another day in this bed is going to drive me bonkers.

I did, however, get to watch The Labyrinth last night on my laptop. It made me want to watch all those great 80's and early 90's movies again. I seriously have a great desire to watch. The Princess Bride, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, Clue, Empire Records, and randomly enough UHF. I love all of those movies immensely.


I also have a random desire for sweet things, including but not limited to Collette's Choc Chip cookies, Kettle Corn and Peanut M&Ms. But I think that eating them all at once would give me a stomach ache.

Apologies in Advance

Warning: I am brutally honest about how I feel in here, and I may offend someone, but it is my blog. I am however, open to discussion.

Today has been miserable.

I tried to get appointments with 4 doctors. One is out of town, one doesn't see cash patients, one (school) didn't call me back and I will call again tomorrow. The last one was the chiropractor who doesn't see people with "disk issues" (which I thought was wierd)

If I can't get one soon, I am just gonna have to go to Harbor General and plead for mercy.

I don't know why it got really bad all of a sudden, but I know that every time it does, I am forced to confront certain realities.

One is that I am too fat. And that is the main reason I have this problem. As excited as I am to weigh so much less than I used to. (I haven't weighed this little in approx 15 years) I am still too fat.

Another reality is a conundrum that I know I am not the only one to face. Nor have I faced it in as stark a reality as others have. And that is that sometimes God's answer to prayer is different from what we'd like it to be. I know that I have changed for the better as a result of having this pain, but there are times like today when not having grown in the ways I have is a tempting exchange for a lack of pain.

The youth are going through the book of Mark in their Bible study and for the first time last night I was able to admit that this is a hard Bible study for me. It seems like everytime I turn a page, Jesus has healed someone or raised them from the dead. Mark 5:34 has probably been one of the most difficult passages for me to reconcile with what I have been taught. "34 And he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in peace. Your suffering is over.” And we are taught that by his stripes we are healed. I firmly believe that God can heal me, and I firmly believe that God loves me. What I have problems with is that my Abba who loves me and sent his son to die for me and suffer so that I may be healed, hasn't healed me. I know that God's plans for me may be bigger than my own, but boy do I wish he had a different way of implementing them.

I sometimes feel like a bad person because this pain affects me emotionally, and I know that there are people out there who live with worse pain and have amazingly positive outlooks on life.

I am afraid of having surgery and its about 50/50 fear of pain and a loss of dignity. I would literally rather live a life of pain than have the surgery that I might be told to have. And while you may think that I am crazy for having those thoughts, I assure you anyone who has lived my life would understand. I have lived my life in the shadow of the hospital and I just can't take it any more.

This whole situation makes me far more emotional than I would like to feel. It reminds me of my situation as an interloper into other people's families and homes and I am drained just thinking about it.

Pardon the emoness. It has been a bad day.

Distraction....

I am having a really bad back day/night. So, to distract me from my misery a little bloggy toy...



The Omnivore’s Hundred
Here’s a chance for a little interactivity for all the bloggers out there. Below is a list of 100 things that I think every good omnivore should have tried at least once in their life. The list includes fine food, strange food, everyday food and even some pretty bad food - but a good omnivore should really try it all. Don’t worry if you haven’t, mind you; neither have I, though I’ll be sure to work on it. Don’t worry if you don’t recognise everything in the hundred, either; Wikipedia has the answers.

Here’s what I want you to do:

1) Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
2) Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3) Cross out any items that you would never consider eating.
4) Optional extra: Post a comment here at www.verygoodtaste.co.uk linking to your results.

The VGT Omnivore’s Hundred:

1. Venison
2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake

Playlist...

When I first heard about project playlist, I thought "Why on earth would I ever need one of those?" But, I have found out that they are amazing! I have four. One for worship, one for general music, one for when I need peppy/ high beat music for cleaning or typing, and one for Christmas.

I think that you can learn a lot about someone by looking at what music they listen to, so I am going to highlight some of my favorite songs from my playlist every once in a while.

Tonight I will feature songs from my general playlist:

Favorite Song: Paper Planes by MIA This song is currently my favorite because it reminds me of my trip. Which I am missing more and more each day. It is a lot of fun, and I get highly overexcited every time it comes on the radio.

Song from ny Childhood: Right Stuff by New Kids on the Block Yep, I was around when they were. I can't believe they are trying to come back, they are so old...

Most Random Song: My December by Josh Groban it is just one of the random songs but it's basically the most random by the fact that it's a Josh Groban cover of what I think is a Linkin Park song. Another random song.... California Love by Tupac

Most Educational Song: We Didn't Start the Fire by Billy Joel Seriously, I used this song to help me get honors on the US History Golden State Test in high school. Which is mostly exciting because I hadn't even taken more than 6 weeks of US history when I took the test.

Friday...

Okay so the website is:

www.bakerella.blogspot.com

I goofed when typing it. She makes really cute stuff.

I just went through a massively long all day orientation for the History club. Jessica was with me and we both wanted to stick chopsticks in our eyes.

Apparently, I am not only hated but am also a racist. I think its funny. I am neither, but people don't get that we are grownups now. Jessica has offered to start a rumor of my membership in the klan. This, I feel would be hysterical, except for the fact that I am afraid the klan would come after me for pretending to be one of them while hanging out with non-WASP peoples.

Today my friend Louise posted her trip pics finally and it made me want to go back to St. Petersburg. I <3 it there.

I have a really long weekend ahead of me, and all I really want to do is get some rest, chill with Jesus, and in general relax. I am at least doing better than the guy sitting next to me in the lab who keeps falling asleep.

I have to work tomorrow, and then I have a paper to write and an outline to do. After that I have to at some point get a gift ready for the baby shower I have to go to on Sunday in between church gatherings. Tonight I am going to the Bower's Museum to see the clay Chinese dudes. Monday I work for Dr. Talamante and then it is a normal week for me, I hope...

At least being so busy is helping with the sleeping issue although I probably should take some melatonin tonight...

Daily Recap

Today was long. Not in the I've had a horrible day type of long, but a I feel like everything is in slow motion type of long. My day was actually not that bad.

I had a test in my humanities class on everything up until WWI and I got 109 out 100 on it, Total Hermione status, I know. I love that this professor hides extra credit in her exams.

Then I had a long break in which I had a yummy blueberry banana smoothie, my first of the year (they are my faovrite) and did some web surfing.

In my next class we discussed war movies and the importance of television in the 1960 Presidential election.

After that I got lunch with Ashley and Chris (we had yummy pizza)

Then my 490 class happened. It is a fun class. But I found out some guy is telling people that the reason that the history club doesn't have that many members is because everyone hates me. Before that would've made me cry. Now, I just don't care. Also, I know it isn't true. My friends don't hate me, some girl was listening to our conversation and got upset on my behalf. I thanked her and then was like, "If he has so much extra time to waste on hating me, then let him have fun, I don't have time to worry bout it."

Besides the history club has 18 members. That is approximately 12% of the department total, not bad for a brand new academic club.

Tomorrow we are going to the Bowers Museum to see the Clay Chinese Dudes. It should prove to be fun and entertaining.

I only had to take pills twice all day. I was excited.

I am kind of sad that my usual Friday schedule is being interrupted for some riddikulus all day orientation of doom, but I'll get over it.
I think that's it for today.

Sweet, Sweet, Sweet, Presence of Jesus

Because I don't know if I will get to post anything later tonight, and because I am trying to post almost daily, but not going to feel bad if I don't....

I<3 the following...

www.cakespy.com
www.bakearella.blogspot.com

and if you combine them you get




The little cake truffle is by bakearella and the photo and character design is by cakespy....

A little more cupcakey goodness for ya!

Response...

Why don't I post everything I write?

Fear
Of being rejected mostly
Of looking stupid
Of hurting someone else
Of causing drama
Of handing someone yet another weapon to hurt me with

That's why