Identity Revealed

So...

I've been contemplating sharing what exactly my lion is for a while and I was waiting to tell one more person in person before I do, but I will write this out now and hope I get a chance to tell that someone myself.

I have always felt called to adoption. Always. Even before I contemplated the fact that I don't want to give any one, especially my child, my genetic makeup. I always have known that I am willing and able to love children I did not give birth to as my own.

So, while this has always been a far away plan, it has now become my lion.

I didn't think of it as such until I was trying to convince someone that I didn't have a lion to chase, and I kid you not, I had the whole inaudible voice of God telling me yes you do. And then the person I was talking to, who I had already shared my plans with, said yes you do right at the same time. I literally had to pause the conversation I was having with my friend and stop and I realized that while I was actively making plans to change my lifestyle in accordance with my plan to adopt, I hadn't considered it a lion to chase. (If you are confused about the lion talk, I highly recommend Mark Batterson's book, In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day)

So, I am going to be making some decisions based solely on the outcome of how will this action affect my future children. I am trying to learn and grow in the ways I need to to become a good mom. I am going to work on developing the spiritual attributes that will serve me well as a mom. I am making decisions about my life and stuff like education and finances all with the intent of adopting.

I know there are some people who will think I am absolutely ludicrous to contemplate adopting kids as a single woman. I know even more people who still mentally consider me many years younger than I am. My only response is that I believe this is to be a large part of my calling. I do want to get married one day, and I believe that will happen. But I am also in full faith that any man who truly loves God and Me will also love my children. I am also rapidly approaching the age of 30, while I do not believe that this is old in any way shape or form, I do believe that regardless of other peoples' opinions, I am old enough and mature enough to make these kinds of decisions for myself.

I am not going to pretend I am headed out on an easy path of daisies and sunshine, I know that this is going to be difficult in many different ways. But I truly believe it is going to be worth it. And I have total peace about the situation.

So, I am honestly interested in peoples' respoines but at the same time, do be courteous and remeber that I have feelings.